When you are making changes, when you are in transition you will find yourself between worlds. You know the old no longer suits you, that the old is ending. But the new is not clear yet. This in between phase of not knowing is often the most difficult phase.
I see this with my clients who want to make career changes. They know the old job or old way of working is no longer fitting. But they have no idea what the new should be. So they find themselves in the in between, in a sort of no man’s land. This will often feel very uncomfortable.
This is not a phase you can skip.
It is part of the transition process. When you know this is a normal part of transitioning to something new. Can you give yourself permission to just be with the uncomfortable feeling of not knowing? To be with the uncertainty, the fear, the anxiety. To acknowledge this career or job I am in, is no longer what I want. But I just don’t know yet what the new career direction, the new job that will suit me is going to be.
Allowing yourself to be in this in between state means that you don’t have to rush into something new, to rush into action to get rid of the uncertainty or get rid of the fear of not knowing.
You also don’t have to remain unmoving until you have a fully formed idea and fully formed plan about your next career step.
There is a beautiful middle road
Using this phase of not knowing as an exploration and experimentation phase, where you don’t commit to anything yet. Where you don’t have to have any answers or fully formed ideas.
To give yourself permission to not know for a while, and just explore and experiment. This in between phase is the phase where you allow yourself to follow your curiosity, to explore, to learn. This is the phase where you take small steps that honour what you are curious about. Where you set up small experiments to honour your curiosity. Where you take small actions to learn about this thing you are curious about. Just for the purpose of learning and satisfying your curiosity.
When you can relax in the not-knowing it is easier to hear the whispers of your curiosity and you are more open to seeing opportunities for exploration and experimentation.
Steps for the in between phase
Step 1: Give yourself permission to not know for a while, to just be with the uncertainty, fear and anxiety. Knowing this stage is a totally normal and necessary part of transitioning. You don’t have to decide anything yet, you don’t have to know what the new will look like.
Step 2: Take some time to go within so you can hear the soft whispers of curiosity within you. Also look around you with curious eyes.
Step 3: When you feel you are curious about something (however small). What small action can you take this week to honour that curiosity. What can you do to explore or to experiment? Just for the purpose of learning.
Have a beautiful week!